I give in to the surge of urgency and give the first night a try.
Fail. Without success. Alarm fail to wake me (a sleepy me) up at 3am.
The second night *take two*
I was awoke with a lurch in stomach and a agonizing pain in my tummy, as i dreamt about zombies and hot-barreled shotgun. A very bad combination like Cola and Mentos.
Grabbing my bro's wristwatch for a peep, it shows clearly 2.12am under the blinding florescent glare. Perfect, exactly 38 minutes before i plan to wake up.
Turning of my alarm, i ran downstairs with a speed that would break the world's record but sadly, witnessed by no one, into somewhere that i doesn't belong at times like this. What do you call it?? Lavatory aka Gents aka Ladies
*IS it that another shot of pain will drive me into unconciousness?? be my guest*
After the longest hour of my desperate life, i made myself a hot malt drink, seconds before i come to realize that my stomach is suppose to be sleeping at times like this. Resting to gain the energy to work the next day. Poor guy, just disrupted your sleep didn't I?? Hope you won't be sleep deprived tomorrow. Oh wait, my mistakes. i'm suppose to say "later part of today".
Opening up my laptop, my hand starts to dance frantically on the board that consist of keys made up of Roman letters. So what am i going to blog about?? i wondered as words starts to form on my blank pages. Great, no point asking. Something random will come out anyways.
A big fat ugly lizard is trying to push itself through the seam of the door, i better don't fool around with the door or else i might squashed the bug.
Something come into my mind. Something so overwhelming and heartwarming that i tried really hard to push away. The kindness of the particular family, how they treat others with goodness while they themselves prosper. Kind to the fact that i might not raise my heads upon them just because they're simply too good. What was that called, intimidating kindness?? Speechless blessings?? I don't know. I know not. That's just something that'll motivate me to treat others the same way they did to me.
And then my mind is diverted to her instead. It's suppose to be a sweet thing to do before, suddenly thinking about her, thought of her and miss her suddenly, like those old days in the tattered pages of history. What is she doing now, sleeping i guess?? My mind holds no answer anymore. Do i care about that?? No, apparently. Something had sealed myself in from all hurtings and pains; or opt two, something had taken the part of me which was attached to her away, reaping the emotional part from it's very core.
Speaking of which, i was reminded again that all the pains and sufferings in this wordl means this earth is not my home. I'm going to leave world someday too, like any other breathing guys and girls dozing around in this hour, and i'm going to leave all this misery and desperatemo-ness as i left the world. Something to be anticipated, at least. For the time being, the very idea of losing someone had twisted or somehow mixed my personality.
Okay, 3.00am. Favourite time for prayers and ghost haunting.
Could i see Ju-On face outside the window if i turn around and peek??
I turned around.
Yikes!!! A strange reflection of myself on the semi-opaque glass window, nothing else.And i drew a conclusion that here comes the end of all this randomness.
I typed my last words
Clicked "create post"
And logged off.
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