Anorexic

Can't feel any weirder after the coming back from the long hiatus.
Exam is now on going and sadly extremely excruciating. Many things happened. People are pushed to their limits. And many problem emerges, need to be faced and solved.

I think I'm so loosely attached to everything, in a way I tend to seclude myself from everything, and think that it's even okay when it is not. Merely by reflect on myself and my condition, I know that I'm now non-existent, and not significant in the community.

Why is that so??
Maybe its because I've never really rooted in any place since I was born?
All my life I've encountered many times of switching environment, moving into new places, change school. All that, with new norms, new friends, and new characteristics developed to adapt to the new surrounding.

And from all that, I've never really emotionally attached to any people or places long enough for me to feel complacent with my life. If truth be told, do I really know the complacency that I am seeking? Why can't things be any easier?

It's not cool at all to victimized myself like this, but I just don't know how to get out of it. What is the thing that I'm seeking??

19 more days to the end of A2.

2 comments:

Michelle said...

On the bright side, you encounter and experience more and different thing than the majority.
You're able to broaden your view and this somehow add spices to your life, making it more colorful.. :)

Joshua said...

Haha.. got to agree with you but just hoping that I'm given a choice back then.

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