Its just really tiring to live sometimes you know.
The constant judgement from everyone around you.
Trying to be your best self but people just keeps beat you down.
Trying to rise again but they beat you and ask you to stay down.
Now I really know why the bible says we live in a world of sin.
...
There are those times when unfortunately, people starts to have a unrealistic, perfect impression of you.
Yea, you heard me right, it is unfortunate when people think of you as a really nice person.
True, it might help you boost your relationship with that particular person, or land you a couple of goodies from time to time. sure.
But honestly, do you think you can keep up the image and be the perfect person that is not really you?
You can for sure try, but ultimately you will fail.
And what awaits then? Crashing, crumbling down of your image.
That person can no longer recognize you as who they think you are in their mind, because they really dn know you in the first place.
So what does that left you with?
Probably a new enemy, or a person who's really afraid of you.
Its really unfair sometimes when people cant see the real you before they form an impression of you.
Its not fair when they think highly of you when its not realistic
And its not wise when you try to act better than you really are.
Which brings us back to my previous post about when someone first met you, they should get an info card, or a presentation about who you really are. Then they can choose to piss off or start a relation with you, embracing who you really are.
Anyways, I am not getting anywhere by saying all these. We are in fact, the very creature that we are criticizing.
...
Humans by nature are judgmental creatures.
They look at all the good you have done, and cant see it, or thinks it is expected of you.
One mistakes and BOOM, they will rain judgement on you.
What about all those goods you have done before this? They turn out to be insignificant in the eyes of those who had already nailed you to the cross.
God waited patiently for the end of world to judge us, who are we to judge so soon?
Its good sometimes to have someone who really knows you to your core.
Someone who knew about your weakness, who can see your strength and celebrate it
Who knows the reason for all your actions, and the way you do things, the way you think, and see everything that you do as normal.
and understands you
But I am a freak, I am a weirdo, what the hell am I doing here, I dont belong here.
The thirst for being understood is all too real now.
I am sorry to disappoint. I really do.
...
They say you either die a hero, or you lived long enough to be the villain.
I guess here comes the Darkening story Arc of my life eh.
Lets see.
