29-2-2012

Question : What does it feel like to be consumed??

It's like facing a whole troop of enemy team full on IMBA imbalance players in a captain ball game and you yourself know deep down that you don't stand a chance against them. You start to think about all the unfairness that you've been treated with and you start to loath the opposite team for playing such an awesome game as the member of your own team can't even work together well, functioning as a team to take on the others.

Oh ya, whatever they've done will be foul in your eyes and you'll think that somehow they are plotting against you by sticking together in the same team, as if they've planned to be put into the same team from the start. You will think, " what the hell is this?? Should i just leave and let them continue with their winning streak??" And then you're tested on the one thing for that particular moment.

SPORTSMANSHIP.

It takes all that I am to continue to play and hold on to the slimmest chance that we might win.

And in the end, David do have the capability to beat Goliath after all. =)

...

Breathtaking, isn't it?? The wonder of the heaven that can be seen with mortal eyes.

It will be up to you to decide whether to call me a hermit, or some slow invertebrates if you wish to, but i realize that i particularly enjoy walking slowly under the twilight, or below the sunset, just for the sake of the view, and the mild, contaminant-free breeze. I enjoy this kind of walk.

And also, to spend a whole full hour in my bed, reading my favourite book, earphone plugged in untill i eventually feel tired and fall asleep. The contentment is what put me at rest, and lift my spirit for the following day.

Well, isn't this kind of life enjoyable??

Ya, maybe i'm a bit slow-paced. I am a low-level organism living on the planet.

...

Finally the FESKOTT (Festival Sukan Kolej Teknologi Timur) is over, and sadly, we didn't manage to get NO.1. sad case. Anyway, we do get NO.2 for the Aerobic dance competition though. Finally, all those times where you have to learn to dance and shake your butt like a girl paid off.

Do I Look Like Him?? XD

...

I seriously meant what I said this morning.

Yea, those simple words that I've said to you.

I just want to come clear and perhaps practice some Radical Honesty.

Well, it worked.

I don't care if you think that I'm joking, or am i not. 

But i truly meant every word that i said.

And i fully understands what situation am i in so i seriously know what to do.

So, no worries. =)

some animal instinct eh??

小小世界

我卻仍願抓住一點自認是永恆的東西，哪怕只有游絲般微弱。


那永恆的東西裡就有人情，似紙的人情。紙很薄，卻可以寫情書，寫詩，寫溫情的句子， 寫必要的問候，當然還可以畫畫兒，可以折成一隻小船，放到小溪裡，任其順細碎的波浪旋轉著飄向遠方。~ 劉心武


小时候认识的朋友，总觉得他们都好天真，好喜欢他们，好像跟他们在一起玩乐。

大家小时候都是这样的吧？？

没有心机，只有小小的调皮

没有勾心斗角，只有单纯的一个小小世界。


好想念，好想念。

那些年，我在你们身边的日子。

成天沉溺在小孩的快乐当中，捉迷藏，玩游戏机，讲游戏。

郊游？？天大日子。



现在？？

现在，是敌是友？？

谁才是佳友？？

总觉得和我玩捉迷藏，游戏机，谈游戏的朋友没了......

郊游？？一个人，一个背包，一架脚车，一个孤单。

你们可以说我还长不大

但是我是被这世代的现实噎着了。

朋友，你们还在吗？？

时间过了许久，我才发现为了加入他们，我做了多么多事情，

人毕竟只是一个有情感的动物

懂得寂寞

懂得孤单

所以就要堆在一起，成为一群。

但是，即使你们是朋友，但是散播恨恶的，我不要。

其他想要加入的，我不能出言阻止，

只能看着，对不起。

小心了，我真心关心的朋友们，不要因为孤单而加入了。

一旦加入了，你也会变成他们一样，

我知道，

因为我见识过。

担心。

Post 18 review

Well i know this post is certainly very very very out of date and I really didn't mean to abandon my blog and indulge in my own celebration..... ya, I'm now officially 19. =)

Special thanks to :

Chelsea "Hungry Bird" Khor

Yich "N" YiFi ChengFeng

Vin cent "rose" Tan

Eunice "Pei Pei" Wong

Zhi Liang the guy-who-was-born-a-day-after-me

Chiu Woan the one with ultimate Perasanity "self-confidence"

Xiao Tian

Angel Malay Chicken

Estella la la la la la, elmo's world...

Jentek

Jon

Roy the wirawati

Tong sampah  awesome yeng!

毛茸茸

WHY YY??

Peter Lee

大家姐 Jun Jun

Jenny SNSD

Mr. Angry Bird Ng

Kok

Xin Jie

Yee Theng

Thank you people for making my birthday a memorable one. If there's any chance please do celebrate again with me next year ya.. XD "special thanks" for the surprise of dragging me out of the house and put me on the Grill.... 

And thanks to my fellow housemates for the awesome wallet. =) Love it and am gonna change it soon. XD

And a heartfelt "thank you" for those who wished me happy birthday, thank you for bearing me in your mind. You are seriously awesome. =)

...

老了一岁，顿时觉得世界不再那么的简单。

几时环境开始变得难应付？？

持之以恒？？

放弃？？

我确实长大了，

大家也长大了，

环境也变了，

唯有我仍然抓住过去，

活在现在，

面对一个无知的未来。

...

Can someone teach me how to react when something bad is happening and I don't have the strength to stop it??

True Love

It’s interesting and weird at the same time how people tend to hold on to something tangible in order to believe that particular incident or person is actually real. We tend to hold on to memories, relations, and so as facts and data just to make sure that everything that is played in our minds are actually existing.

Can I say that humans are so ridiculous that they can’t even believe the existence of things that they themselves remember??

Or should I just say that humans are so ridiculous that they choose to believe the true, substantial things before coming to believe themselves??

Then so, what is love?? Does it have a fixed volume?? Can it be measured definitely?? What kind of properties does it have, Acidic?? Alkaline?? Metallic ?? or is it just Amorphous??

So since it can’t be measured or felt physically, and have no a physical unit, so love is not real.

So then, since Love is “not real”, why is that that we believe in it??

Someone who used to be fighting alongside with you, promising you that it will be a lifetime to be spend when she’s with you?? Is that love?? NO. Words are not love.

Someone who gave you occasional gifts, surprise you with sweet present that will brighten up your day?? Is that love?? No. Gifts are not love.

Someone who can make you feel good, makes you feel that you are the only one in the world?? Is that love?? No. Feeling good is not love.

Love is just a term invented by those who have a strong desire to own what they favour, a word that is used to cover people’s blind sight. Infatuation. The yearning to own something and a wish not to be shared with anyone. An Obsession.

True love makes you smile with pure satisfaction.

True love makes you cry upon realization

True love encourages you to love unconditionally

True love endures all things.

Sometimes love can be fake, But true love is what that’s lingers on and lives on. Happy Valentine’s day.

Insignificant Chant

What should i write about today??

Well, life's been quite eventful these days, the Book Hunt to KL, The Fesni event, and the Third Chinese New Year, but i come to decide that i won't be putting up update on these events just so i can quiet myself down. Breath in and out some fresh air, and settle down to start anew. Yes, you are right, blogging is a very very hard thing to do.

for how long since i started blogging?? four years?? Five years?? How many time had i put into this lifetime career, to open up my world to a worldwide population of readers?? To open up a small window for those who care to take a peek in?? i bet it is already countless, became a part of the ever-shifting sands of time.


Here, anyway, this is what the actual chinese new year celebration in KTT looks like. I'm especially in favour with the awesome backdrop created by our special artist. Credits all goes to Yue Yu, and no one else. =)
\

...

And who cares what happens to Whitney Houston??

Here is someone who needs our care more, more than some legendary singer who brought revolution to the music industry.

A tragic accident, a tragic news. Something that are not suppose to happen. 6 childrens. One father. One breadwinner. One and only. Dead due to mosquito bite.

What is this?? Do you know that they need their pillar of strength so much?? Why take him away from them?? How can they live on without him??

But it was then i realize that though hard, they have to carry on.

Though he's gone, they have to continue to live on hard.

And though hard, they have to pull it through.

And it serves as another solemn reminder : life is fragile. You will never realize the moment when you will cross the line between life and death.

"But he said to me :"My grace is enough for you, for My power is made perfect through 

weakness." So then, i will boast most gladly about my weaknesses,

so that the power of Christ may reside in me"

2 Corinthians 12:9

...

Is this called littering??

Tomorrow,

I will embrace the fact that tomorrow is valentines days

and dear ANTIMATTER,

meet the world.

How do you do??

What are friends for??
Are they just a company that you get along with?? Or someone that can share your everything??

It's not that i don't like to befriend with you, just that i don't feel good when you guys just seclude yourselves within your own social circle, living in your own world of friends, and ignore everyone else around you. This is not right, at least for me. Cause i saw her in you, i saw how self-centered you guys all are.

But i know deep down in my mind that i can't blame you all, it's human nature that people flocks together and sticks as a gang, that certain groups of people will develop strong bonds when they spend more time together. It's just human nature...

Or maybe, I'm just a jealous brat. There's a distance between the housing estate and the college apartment. I can't always go there, always be there to gather and fun with you all. That's why you guys are so distant from me. and for that, I don't feel sweet watching you guys having fun together....

Well, that's human nature too... =' )

But please, don't ignore other unhappy faces around you. Please don't indulge in your own happiness while other people dwindled and died.

饭菜波, i will never forget you. =) thanks for being my friend. =)

...

Finally I'm done with the Chinese New Year celebration... =)

Now i finally do realize two kinds of people existing in a group.

One of the kind is people who silently do all the work, hides there when people wants to give credit, and claims no praises from people, even though they truly deserve the praises. 

Another kind, people who play and loiter around as a group and practically didn't contribute to the cause. Shows minimum efficiency by doing the slightest work as a large group. Do not automatically seeks for job to be done.

As for me, i think i'm somewhere in the middle, the third species.. XD

Sigh.

Long Time

The business is sucking the very soul out of my thin husk of flesh.

Just done with the FESNI choir competition, some Disney Medley which turns out to be a minor success  (weirdly many people say that its really intriguing, though we all agree that we did a couple of mistakes) Anyway, what's past is now good, and we indeed had tried our best, from the "Suck like my Ass" group of in-a-crisis choir, now we are something that can bring joy and excitement to the night.

Now who says we are suck like an Ass?
We are the Flaming Fury.

Now at least we did something for the dignity of our Group. At least we are no like the ones who only talks and do nothing. 

Now talking about talk and do nothing, the Student Council had done it once again. =)

Very very thank you for the 1 Malaysia Book Voucher, now we have the chance to spend the tax-payers' money for something good. =)

OOooops....

WHAT IS LOVE??

Once a Student asked his Teacher, "What is love?"

The Teacher replied, "To know the answer of your question, you have to go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back, but there is one rule you must follow: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the field, go through first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later.

Then he saw another bigger one... But may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.

Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he started to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he know he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.

So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand…..

The teacher told him, "My dear..This is called love... You keep looking for a better one, but when later you realize, you have already missed the person...."

"What is marriage then?" the student asked.

 The Teacher said, "In order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake .

When he reached the middle of the field, he picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy, and came back to the teacher.

The teacher told him, "This time you bring back a corn.... You look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get...."

Thought for the day :