There are things that I need to put here first before i continue on fighting for my life.
Life is a struggle.
I am constantly caught in between been tired due to intensive work, and being depressed due to no income, due to no work.
It seems I have failed to appreciate the good side of both circumstances.
God help me.
Life is disappointing.
because life is full of people who want to put you down,
simply because they have the power to do so, and you are not willing to give in for the sake of his ego,
or some they just feel so entitled they treat you like a servant instead of someone who tries to help you.
Yes, I have been put down by people who used to hold a high post in Government. For what? for bruising his already fragile ego. Yes. He just reached out to old acquaitance he used to know in the gov, a direct line to the health ministry, who turns out to be a mighty boss many level above me.
I was been made an example so others wont do what I do. I was given the order to write letters to explain my actions, because the louder voice painted me like a disrespectful cunt who gave no fucks about senior citizen.
but has anyone hear about the other side?
Have they heard about the uncultured words that he repeatedly thrown at me, and the kind of outrage he had shown me while all i want was to defuse the situation.
He was a warmonger out for blood, and he wants more unless he got the "respect" that he deserves
and he got just the right connection to strike me down
I am just a nobody, and he made a point that I am just a nothing that he can easily squish in between his fingers.
...
The other fella thinks he can get 5 star service with RM1 registration fee for the treatment.
Hes's nobody, really. I think he sells car or something.
But he's a got an ego of a king.
To be completely honest, I am the kind of person who strive to give my best to a patient, so he/she might think, hey a dentist is not bad, not so scary.
I derive job satisfaction from knowing that I gave my patient a good time while accepting a decent dental treatment.
NOOOOOOoooooooo man this fella wants more, he wants to be treated like a king, or rather, to be babied with tender, loving and care.
the 2 times he came, he ended up complaining to the boss about little things that dont matter.
Maybe he just enjoy the attention.
Fuck me, when bad things happen, they happen together.
I was made again to give in to the authority, to please the egotistical megalomaniac.
and at the same time reinforce the mindset that you can get whatever you want by making a scene.
Go to a fucking drama school would you?
...
心里总是有万分的不服气
为什么人类总是需要自己被在乎？
是不是当大家安分守己地活着，只要不符你的理想，
就是冒犯你。
Do you seriously think everything in life revolves around you?
What kind of culture are we trying instill in the younger generation??
...
"As a member of government service, we are trained to say "please", "thank you", and "sorry" to create a harmonious, friendly environment for the patient, while produce a brand image that government service can be warm, affordable with good quality"
"What most of us fail to notice is that we let a certain group of egotistical trash get their way and use government servants as a means to give a sense of security to their inferior complex."
"When there's any confrontation, we as government servants "need to" readily give in and take up the guilt no matter how unreasonable pt's complaint is.
We let them win, while fully aware that we were not at fault"
"And all these just so we can avoid official complain and accusations which will result in lengthy formal investigation and interview.
In the end, unreasonable people will get what they want and us as government servants are often oppressed, because we are "peramah"
"To make matters worst, head of unit/department would often choose not to defend our own and advise to continually give in to their whims and unreasonable tantrums.
Just what kind of mindset are we trying to inculcate in the public here ?"
"Everyone saw, that by shouting and raising voices infront of everyone, you can get special treatment and priority. Next time, what argument can we give to others who tried to do the same to get the same special treatment?
Is this the right way to prove that "We Care"?"
"All that I can say is that Government service has done a very good job in encouraging laziness, ego-stroking, hierachial priorities, and many more traits that doesn't reflect our Malaysian values
This got to stop and change, if we want to have a morally-upright future generation"
Maybe life is so frustrating its taking the peace away from me.
There will always be a part of me that I will find hard to control.
A part that speaks before the brain allows, which always land me in troubles.
and with life happening, now my word sometimes stings.
I need to think once, twice, thrice before speaking
more to learn.
how insignificant I am
more on that next time. Sleep time again. My tired body cant keep up with my depressed soul.
